December 21st 2014

December 21^st 2014: Jesus I forgot how abysmal working Sundays could be. It is DEAD around here. On the plus side no supervisors are here to cause problems. I’m better off keeping to myself on Sundays. No one really gives a shit who is doing what so it’s cake. I’m spending most of the day acting like a shadow. I am on the Court so I just have to do 10-100s. On days like this, when we are short and even (redacted) has to do lunch reliefs, the Court is pretty much not required. Further adding to the whole shadow thing.

Today I have been writing in this notebook and listening to music through my Bluetooth headset. I have also been sneaking into the Kitchen. They have these heavy jugs of apple cider for their snob special events. However it said “refrigerate after opening” and as much as I would like to make some rich fuck’s tummy rumble, it’s the Holiday season. Oh and also I am not really a big fan of cider; hard or soft. 

December 18th 2014

December 18^th 2014: Last night was the annual Christmas party. (Redacted) won the award. First of all it’s well deserved and secondly it’s good that someone in Security got it. (Redacted's) a hell of a nice guy and it makes sense that he won. Since it was the Christmas party everyone was there. Except, like usual, there was barely any mingling between departments. They don’t communicate professionally, why communicate casually? Mismanagement only stayed for as long as it took to stuff her gullet and give out the award. She gave a halfhearted speech, that was more than likely written by someone else, and was sitting at the table that was blocking the dance floor. Though mainly she left early because she was not fucking welcome. Her giant ass knocked over two drinks and she piled a plate of food a foot high. I will admit that even without Mismanagement's food hoarding there are slim pickings at those Christmas parties. So I got a slice of Greek pizza before I showed up. It’s enough to fill me up because it’s a big slice. The main reason I decided to go was the free beer. I drank about five and finished off whatever concoction (redacted) was drinking.

Oh and of course Knucklehead was there too. I made the mistake of initiating conversation with him. From there he tried to make small talk with all of us. You know the awkward stand-around-while-one-person-thinks-of-something-to-say-while-the-rest-want-him-to-fuck-off thing? Everyone is still trying to figure out who the “mole” is. Everyone knows it’s (older redacted) but no one is really sure, there could be others because on that kiss-ass list. I was concerned that talking to Knucklehead would make ME look like the teacher’s pet. If you have not figured it out by now I AM NOT a kiss ass. I do not believe in it, and as far as the Art Museum is concerned, it’s not worth it. Security is already a very thankless job, not worth wasting the energy.

Speaking of Knucklehead he got pretty stoned last night. I even got video of him dancing with the head of HR. Before the dancing they were being pretty flirty. Looks like he’s got another affair going on. One night, and I may have mentioned this before, (redacted) told me about Knucklehead's first Christmas party where he “got close” to a chick named Nancy that use to work here. “They weren’t just dancing, they were grinding”, he told me. Knucklehead and his BJ weren’t exactly “grinding” but it looked intimate. I saved the video on my laptop for later use as blackmail material. No I am not kidding. Like I said before these fuckers are evil and now they are pawns.

Today I’m posted on the Court with the award winner. (Redacted) is not here so we are the front line for 10-100s, but he keeps getting called away for stuff. One of the things the Surveillance Room needed him for was to check the store. They got a call about a possible shoplifter. Turns out the “shoplifter” was just an old black man looking for his gloves. The award winner thinks they are prejudice, and they probably are. They have to deal with a different set of individuals than we do. They are fat and angry women devoid of humanity. It’s a little spooky how the one chick does that exasperated eye bulge thing when she breathes out. They are just not very friendly.

So later tonight I will be taking over 2nd Floor. R.J. goes home at 5:00PM. That will be a nice change of pace for the last four hours of the day. Mismanagement wanted me and (redacted) to do the paperwork for the Court. The bitch who’s in charge of the paperwork, does not realize she needs to actually MAKE new paperwork for us to do. 

Manpower

 I have probably already covered this subject on several occasions, but where I work it’s a constant problem. It is no secret that the people in charge do not care about being there, neither do the subordinates like me, but THEY are suppose to be in charge.

If you are the boss in any work environment you must keep a record of where your people are and utilize their potential for the task at hand. This is unfortunately not the case in our Security department. There is also a total lack of common sense in all tiers of command. Which has caused a steady drop in morale over the time I have worked there.

When an event occurs they rely on volunteers before they forcibly recruit Full-Time officers, if they do not have the people to cover it. This of course causes ill-will among the ranks for two reasons. Firstly there are guards specifically designated to work events, but have the freedom to not work it if they choose. Secondly Management often over, or under, books the amount of personnel needed. The ideal scenario would be to have so many Special Event guards that there would be no need for forced labor.

Even when there are enough people they are never posted where they need them. Often times there are more guards than necessary. Standing around, literally guarding nothing and no one. If nothing is said their time is wasted. The shift Supervisor won’t say anything because they don’t want to admit when they ARE wasting their staff’s time. In Predator’s case, the guy who is always in the middle of these situations, he just wants to cover his own ass.

Trust me; where I work they are often wrong. Everyone knows it, and they do a better job of hiding this than actually using their manpower appropriately. 

December 13th 2015

December 13^th 2014: Today I am posted on the North Court. They re-opened a couple of the rooms but the majority is still closed for storage. Which basically means my patrol pattern is the same shape as a dick and ball sack. The balls being the open galleries. I decided I will go to the Christmas party. Hopefully the beer will be free like other years. With the way the economy is I have reason to doubt.

They have a Awards ceremony going on again (not that I knew about them to begin with…) and Mismanagement actually gave us an option to vote within our department. Everybody looked up with lazy amusement and shock. Even though they get a “choice” it does not really matter. It’s just the illusion of an option, or at least that’s what everyone has come to perceive thanks to the constant in-fighting tactics her and Knucklehead employ. I voted twice!

D.S., doing leg work, just gave me a copy of en e-mail about the new parking rates. Firstly I do noy qualify because I am part-time, secondly I cannot afford it even if I did! So here’s their plan; they want to raise prices so that they have room for more parking spaces… let me finish… for guests. That’s right; they plan to attract more guests by raising the prices at the parking lot. Not only that but in order for a staff member to park there they need to pay up to $180 a month for a special pass. This is obviously for people who don’t work in Facilities. One reason why I never drive to work.

I guess I am paranoid, or something, today. When I was getting off my hour break, and waiting for the elevators, I saw (redacted) blatantly talking on his cell phone. Except this time I swore I heard him say “My Name” then he quickly hung up (or I guess I should say “closed”) the phone and starred straight ahead. Everyone thinks I do not give a shit to the point that I do not catch on to things. Whatever (redacted) was talking about, he’s probably already forgot. Why not? He forgets everything else, or at least he pretends to. That’s what happens when you have nothing better to do; you plot and scheme, or you write it all down, or you sleep standing up. Mr. B is freakishly good at that. 

December 6th 2014

It's not just the people that run the surveillance room that are completely retarded. The event planner can be Gilbert Grape sometimes too. This was a prime example of that. "Let's let drunks possibly fall over the side of the balcony and fucking die, oh and you make sure that doesn't happen while you guard three other places." Cunt...

December 6^th 2014: Mr. Ass announced today that he’s going on medical leave for a while. Not sure the nature of his condition, or how long he said he would be out. I guess it has something to do with that stick up his ass. Later on I found it is an ass operation, I kinda feel bad about that comment, but I do hope the doctors remove the whole thing. If you leave the root it will just come back.

There’s still no paper work and I am posted on the second floor. I am going to be here until midnight tonight. Well not 2nd floor ALL night. Later they posted me on R+G+G after 5:00PM. I will be here for the remainder of the night and everyone in authority is retarded.

It’s a Christmas party for Zenimax media, the guys who publish Bethesda Softworks; the makers of Fallout, Elder Scrolls, etc. The last time they had a holiday party here I was posted in the same place but Captain Redacted was up here backing me up (well apart from that 30 minute 10-100 he justifiably took). Anyway Heather is always in charge of these messes. This time they are keeping the balcony open too. The fucking balcony! You know the balcony that leads to a marble death if you fall off of it? Imagine that but mixed with drunk idiots and see my concern. If someone dies it’s not on me. I am just going to stand in the Landing all night. I practically have to because I need to make sure drunk morons do not come into the galleries OR the Loggia carrying drinks.

Apparently I’m suppose to prevent them from going up and down the stairs with them too, I just laughed when I heard that. I’m one man doing the job of three. Even D.J. came upstairs and complained about it, she was suppose to be downstairs preventing drinks from coming UP the stairs. I checked the art before the party, still looks the same as always. Not that the conservation department sees that. There’s a scavenger hunt going. I think I’ll spend the night helping everyone cheat! No one is even hardly going out on the balcony (thank you Jesus). The snooty event planner bitch fails! HAHA! Everyone is reading the signs too. Zenimax is a good crowd except for whoever started that brawl downstairs. Yep even the cops were called, between this and the skinny super model chicks flashing their asses, I don’t think we have to worry about Zenimax coming back again. 

November 29th 2014

If you have connections with Management you can do whatever the hell you want while they do whatever the hell THEY want. No one really looks into these things, but it does help to have dirt on them. Which I suppose I should put to better use than posting it in a blog? Eh.

November 29, 2014: So today I was put on third floor of the old building with officer (redacted). (Redacted) had Gold while I had Red and Green. Around 2PM, after (redacted)’s hour break, he talked on his cell phone, then informed me that I had to cover the entire area, handed me the keys, and told me that Mismanagement already knew. I don’t have a problem with covering all of R+G+G. I actually prefer it! What sucked was that my break got pushed back, Mismanagement let one of her homies go home early, and now (redacted) has his out.

Yeah the dragon bitch came in today. She’s had Looney Toons and D.S. going all over the place because they are her subordinates. I am just going to hide in a corner for 20 minutes at 2:45. Then when (redacted) (the only relief guard free apparently) comes around I will tell him “I’m taking 30.” He does not care, he’s cool with it. Ever since they cut back our afternoon breaks relief officers have not had anything to do for 30 minutes after the last tier of breaks anyway. Besides Mismanagement's buddies likes to take those extra long breaks.

Later on in the day Looney Tunes told me about why she takes extra long breaks. A few years ago she requested a 10-100 but no one came to relieve her, it ruptured her bladder and she has a nice lawsuit hovering over Knucklehead. So that's why she's able to take 30-40+ minute breaks without complaint because she has doctor’s papers. I think (redacted) has some dirt on them too, perhaps he’s not so much an Uncle Tom as he’s got management wrapped around his fingers.

I went to call a 10-100. Mr. Ass asked if I would be back in time or it was going to sit right through. I said I’d try to be back in time, he replied “I would advise it”, so I said “10-4 I’ll squeeze hard then.” It is cute that he’s concerned over my bowel movements. Nothing scares me here, but a lot of stuff pisses me off. Mr. Ass is one of those things. I should consider threatening a lawsuit on these fuckers myself. I have plenty of dirt on them. Also apparently Looney Toons has been taking notes too. Perhaps we can collaborate on my exposé.